No no no! Don't give up! I want to know the end of the story (and that was a rude crack I made about the teachers, I really didn't mean it. Promise! You *are* better than a lot of people I have seen! Promise! You have talent that is waiting patiently inside- how else do you think you came up with such a great plot?) You have talent, you do, and if writing is your escape, maybe you won't become a writer, but you can always love it, and find someone to love it with you. I eat my words. Don't look at me to decide wether or not to continue. But I would say do. I myself have had years of practice with people trying to help me fine-tune my talent. If you get help and encouragement, you can florish! I promise, that story is just as good as some of my old ones, if not better. It is different, but still holds potential!  Come on, try one more chapter. And don't think no reviews is bad- that is the fate for even good writers- just make yourself known on this site and you won't be ignored forever. And, because I was so rude, (really, I was... I should have assumed nothing, and not have been mean) I am eating my words, and I see the folly in them. Anything you say cannot make me feel worse about them. If you struggle with punctuation and grammar, get a beta. I would be one, though I'm not sure how it all works, what I would need to do. Then, if you still feel like quitting, (if it is because I'm a jerk, please do NOT! I had been having a poor day when I wrote it so... I never said that *wince* I would be ok if you could dealt it. I am a jerk. Out online, I admit it) then you can. But if it helps you, to relax, to refresh, to heal, then never, never quit. One day, someone will find you and like what you do. Really like it. So please, I'll be hanging over this until you respond!

The Jerk 

I suppose English is not your first language (if it is, I should think we need to discuss something with your English teachers) and I can understand why some points struggled, but you still show up some people I've seen who have spoken English all their lives, so no fear! Your grammar stumbled and fared poorly in many cases, making it hard to read, but not so hard I could not see a great idea blooming. Perhaps if you are more patient, and try slightly harder to fix the grammar, this story could do very nicely. I like the idea of Legolas' brothers, but all seem to have... a fake feeling to them. Maybe it is the writing, as I enjoy deeper and lengther looks into such things, but over all, (not looking at the story flow) I liked the plot and it makes for a fun read.

Elemmire

("Valar" is capitalized, and "Thranduilion princes" does not make grammatical sense, meaning literally "son of Thranduil princes" But it was a good idea to get some Elvish terms in the story. Do not be discoaraged, this is still a fine story)