ah... *sigh* a friend can secure any thing indeed. You are very good at creating an emotional comficts. But you build it up, then let it fall. It is anti-climactic, if you know what I mean. One thing that might help this peice would be to make it clear that he is not phisicaly ill, but heart-sick.

I do like you stories, and I am wating with bated breath for more!!

It was different. Many people leave him waiting, not lifting him out of his darkness, neither this nor that a bad thing. But you built up with the whole darkness shmeel, and then kind of dropped. I would of liked it to be dramatic, powerful, and breath taking, but you just let go, lend back in your chair and said"Then he became happy, The End." Now, that clearly wasn't how you ended it, but it was to simple for my tastes, yet good enough to quell my questions. You, with more work (like so many of us, me included), could become very good... *very* good. Don't give it up, keep writing! I cannot leave without saying how you put power into your words, and truth, like a silver dagger. You could break something- be careful! (Tehehehehe... what? It was funny!)

Elemmire