| Eleiel | 11/02/07 09:37 pm | 1: Have No Fear | Signed |
'They are all finnished when are you comming to see?' *giggle* finnaly! Speaking of which, is there any more of this story???? Pleasssee!!!!
Author's Response: I am struggling to work out the rest, so I am not able to promise anything further of this story. I am still writing Legolas and Aragorn things, but I am not quite positive I can finish this with my memory. I am sorry, and I will try to work it out! ~Elemmire Forget not Menelmacar |
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| Mairi | 10/02/07 09:41 pm | 1: Have No Fear | Anonymous |
It isn't easy to make a young child sound like a young child when you write, but you have done a good job of it.
Author's Response: Thank you, Mairi! I am feeling rather unsure of Estel right now, but it's nice to know I have some votes in favour of him! ~Elemmire Star-Sheen
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| Nieriel Raina | 12/19/06 02:34 am | 1: Have No Fear | Signed |
I was reading your reviews, and I see you said Estel is supposed to be 10-13 in this fic. As a mom who deals with kids all the time, I'd say he comes across as maybe barely 10, more like 8-9...and not mature for his age. I also see that this is a what if Estel and Arwen met and didn't realize it. I have to point out that is still very much AU, for you make it clear Estel KNOWS about Arwen. From ROTK The Tale of Aragorn and Arwen..."Often is it seen," said Aragorn, "that in dangerous days men hide their chief treasure. Yet I marvel at Elrond and your brothers; for though I have dwelt in this house from childhood, I have heard no word of you." So Estel would not have known about her at all! And to my knowledge, he never traveled to Lothlorien until he was much older and had been with the Dunedain for a time. One other thing I saw was your terms for grandmother and grandfather. I think the Sindarin is Daeradar and Daernaneth...not the terms you used...but perhaps you used Quenya, for I'm not familiar with that yet. Keep writing! NiRi
Author's Response: Thank you for your insight! Yes, AU, now I must agree. And the really embarassing thing... I totally forgot the whole point to the plot! Aug! I did have one! I have read The Tale of Aragorn and Arwen about three times... and aye, that I must agree with you, but I recall some counter I had to that... I forgot that too! I also have much experiance with children- trust me! Some say he is too mature, others say not enough. So I'm at odds, and must stand my ground. I'll hold him at tenish, though, cuz I get your point. Yea, I know also of his visits to Lorien. I hear you. My Elvish came from a book by Ruth Noel... I think that's her name... called "The Languages of Middle-earth" so your Elvish is probably from a different source than mine. But thanks for pointing that out!
I may consider pulling this story off, and just working on it until I find some complete form, and be able to tackle a few of the problems caught by myself and reviewers (to you I thank most happily). I am thankful of your help, and will take it to heart. Thanks again! Gen hennon! Elemmire S-S
Forget not Menelmacar Aia! I beleg od iaur garbalan admin Enedh-amar! Alae! Pentangle i Resplendent! |
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| Nieriel Raina | 12/19/06 02:23 am | 1: Have No Fear | Signed |
Hm... Well, the writing is very good, I'll give you that. Your descriptions are fabulous. But I don't think I like the story line. Tolkien stated that Aragorn did not even KNOW Elrond HAD a daughter until he met her when he was 20. And I'm not a fan of mixing elvish and English mid sentence. Very fanon of you. *Grin* I'm of the belief that there is a time and place for using elvish in a story, and it is in places like Tolkien used it. I don't like the MC tendency to throw in a few words here and there as it makes it seem the author is simply showing off his or her vocabulary. These are elves...they are speaking in Sindarin the whole time and we know that, therefore it is silly to be talking in English one minute and then throw in an ion nin. At least in my opinion. There are hundreds of MCers who would disagree with me. I really liked your Haldir very much. And I like your little Estel. I just don't like him potentially meeting Arwen until Tolkien says he did and I don't think Elrond would have taken him on a trip to Lothlorien either. But great writing! Keep it up! NiRi
Author's Response: O no! The dreaded "Hm" beginning! *laughs* I totally agree with your Elvish complaint- in fact, I've agreed with you since I began reading fanfics! I found it so puzzling that Elves would (who are supposed to speak Sindarin/Quenya all the time) obviously speak in English and throw in fragments of their own language at random-ish times. Now, sometimes it is appropriate. Like when Gimli is in our midst- I don't think they'd be so rude as to go over his head (and wouldn't he object like he did with Haldir?) But reading so many stories with the mix, it kinda slips out in my own writing. I will... refrain.
I can sympathise (oddly) with your objection to the plot. (Are you a Tolkien purest?) And I'm so happy you're both bold enough to say it, and Tolkien-lore-wise-thingy enough to note it! *young child voice* But you must be nice- this was me rushing out a plot because I weally weally wanted to be up on here! *end childish voice here* No really, beat me up and bruise me. I'll just return the favour! ('Speacially if you put Pentangle in the same league as everybody else! And below Legolass! I can't believe you could do that! I haven't read the others on your tops, so I can't comment on them- but I will!)
I am very proud of my floweriness. I'm told I shouldn't be cuz it stinks... but I can't help it! I love it, and I'm overjoyed you comment well on it. See, I love squirells *grins*! And I am very happy with my Haldir... Estel's just dandy on my Good List too! Elemmire S-S |
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| Calaquendi | 12/05/06 09:51 pm | 1: Have No Fear | Signed |
heyyyyyyy!!! i ( finally ) made a profile!! you can look at it if you want to...of corse you do!!!! right? lol see you 2morrow!!! you will be there right? and did em call or e-mail you?? we have practice at 6:30 2morrow. luv ya like a sister!!
Author's Response: Sure I looked! LOL! I mean, *I* was mentioned! Sort of... you didn't say Elemmire, but O well. 2morrow then... I'll try. Did you look at my new story? I kinda like it... wish you would look sometime. (And we need to find some way for you to put up a poem!) Elemmire S-S |
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| Eleiel | 11/06/06 04:38 pm | 2: Never to See | Anonymous |
aha! the plot does thicken! I like it very much, ecpecialy your portayal of the Lord and Lady Of Caras-Galadhon. Again I found it a triffle vague in parts, though that might be because I read to fast. As far as I can figure, Malgalad means "Golden-light" however the "mal" with one of those pointy arrow things of the 'a' means pollen. Like from a flower. Mall with two l's means gold, the metal. So unless there is another meaning for "mal" it is a very, erm... interesting, name. navar, Eleiel. ps. can't wait to read the rest of it!
Author's Response: O my goodness, that last response was a doozy! Sorry... (I'm on that computer that wipes out my fomatting, and yet its the only one that will let me log on! Grr) Thank you kindly for your research on Malgalad's name- I throw my hands in the air, cuz Tolkien made it! Dude, I'll leave it to him! Ok, back on track, thanks for the second review, you're awesome! I will renew my effort to get the next chapter down- hopefully *before* my birthday rolls around! And thank you for letting me keep my five pretty stars! You're great! (Check out Pentangle- she's ten times my better! I suggest looking at "2 Drabbles", it's the sweetest!) Rim henniad, Elemmire |
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| Eleiel | 11/06/06 03:03 pm | 1: Have No Fear | Anonymous |
Oh, I like it! I especialy liked Estell observation of the City, it was very profound. However, I am a triffle confused about Estel. He was suppoded to be 21 when he met Arwen,(I dont know how old he in now, but he sounds rather young) and in Rivendel. It seems to flow very smoothly, but is a rather vauge in places. And Elstel was a bit abrupt in his questions about Arwen. Well those asre my pices of advice, I hope they are usefull! :P
Author's Response: Mae govannen, Eleiel! Thank you so much for your time! I am truly glad that you like it! I thought his observation of the city fun. To your advice I am very grateful! Most people won't give advice, either too afraid of being rude, or just refuse to for some reason (such as no clue *how* to say it... I fall in there sometimes). In the summary, I said that this story was based on the thought of Aragorn not really meeting Arwen 'first' in Rivendell (though your facts are, to my first glance, correct), but meeting not knowing that they met. It will be come clearer how that comes about in the later chapters. It is my fault I did not make that little detail clear. I am guilty. This Estel is somewhere between ten and thirteen. I never really pin pointed an age. (His choice of words may sometimes sound grown up, but if you consider it, he's growing up with mature *male* Elves, and with strict studies and friends and family that have a 'deeper' vocabulary). If you could point out some of the vauge spots, I would jump at the chance to fix them! I am one to dawdle on some little piece of information then skim horribly over important events. I'm bad like that. And how he was abrupt about Arwen, trust me, it comes from the age. I have FIVE younger brothers, one who is pestering me right now and walking into a door. Yup, that's my life. You, I deem, might relate, having a family (only slightly smaller than mine... I have one on you) of reasonable size.
God is awesome! Rock on, Eleiel! (I'm a Christain, and lovin' it!) ~ Elemmírë Star-Sheen |
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| Calaquendi | 09/09/06 05:43 pm | 2: Never to See | Signed |
Another great chapter!! Sorry it took me so very long to read and reveiw. And I will be very busy now with school and all. I have tons of reading to do for school this year.Kepp on writing!! 10!!
Author's Response: Yeah, I guess that is the way it will be for me. Sadly, I got rudely kicked off of my writing drive for this, so... who knows... Thanks for the ten. You're my loyal reader and reviewer! *huggles* Don't worry about taking a long time to read. I'm patient. *coughlyingcough* (You see me huddled over the laptop at midnight, deer-in-the-headlights-stare, refreshing, refreshing, waiting for a review...)See you tomorrow! (deep voice: do not be alarmed- that was not an actual occurrence!)
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| Calaquendi | 08/28/06 04:19 am | 1: Have No Fear | Signed |
OOOOHHHHH And I forgot to ask: what stroy goes first, the ones by Pentangle? And I messed up on my last reveiw! And** Not an
Author's Response: First goes "Buried: Descent" then "Buried: Revelation" then lastly, but SO not least, my fav "Buried: Ascension" She is a miracle worker! Mithril among the ashes! - Elemmírë Star-Sheen Menelmacar |
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| Calaquendi | 08/28/06 04:14 am | 1: Have No Fear | Signed |
Hey girl!! You need to get the stuff in your head onto the computer!! NEED to!! an I don't think I'll be able to write something for this site. So far, I can only write poetry. And It has to come to me. Nothing's coming! -Tay!
Author's Response: Come on, Tay! You can do it! Do the push up Aragorn, give an angsty deal on him. Do a memory reel on Boromir when Aragorn's king, or have him think of Arwen before he relizes he's got her. I can help— Wednesday, if you're there, I can sit down with you, book, pen, and notebook in hand and get you rolling. The people here *have* to see you! The stuff in my head is leaking out onto the laptop, so no fear, another chapter's coming!
In fact, I'm a-gonna email you right now! In a sec... Elemmírë Star-Sheen |
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| Pentangle | 08/24/06 04:26 am | 1: Have No Fear | Signed |
This is a very unusual pairing of Estel and Haldir. I enjoyed the language - it is very evocative of another place and time. I also loved Haldir's affection for Estel and the wisdom he shared with a little human. I liked it very much.
Author's Response: Aye? That is good news to my heart! Let's see how well I can write while shaking. Is this the first review you have ever posted here? I am so thankful, I cannot portray it. Yes, I thought it would be nice for Haldir to know Estel and show that Elves aren't evil for not liking humans very much. It's not like they hate anything that is not immortal. *grins* I like the language too. That's why this computer doesn't like the dictonary/thesaurus sites anymore. That's my secret. I'm always digging for a bigger, better word. I hope it doesn't get to old to soon. -Elemmire Star-Sheen |
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| Calaquendi | 08/16/06 10:10 pm | 1: Have No Fear | Signed |
Very good!! I never read one of your stories before, but Ash said you were really good. Now I agree with her!! I give you a 10, of course!!
Author's Response: Hi Calaquendi, glad you picked that name... it was the favourite of mine on the list I gave you! O my, thank you for the ten, I nearly fainted when I pulled up my story and found five pretty stars by its name! But it doesn't deserve it, and I can prove it- read Pentangle's "Buried" series, and then tell me I'm good enough for a ten! But hugs to you! You're great! See ya Sunday(you better be there)!
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