Cold wind was blowing into the lone rider's face, but he didn't feel it. It was the cold in his heart that made him shiver. It was always sad to be away from home for the Yule, but this time was worse than ever.

He couldn't go home. No matter how hard he tried, no matter how stubbornly he fought, no matter how far he rode. He had no home.

Legolas looked back in the direction he had come from. Mirkwood. His home? Yes, it had been once, but it was hard to feel at home at a place engulfed by darkness. Fortunately, he had found a new home somewhere else.

Imladris was a place where his troubled soul would always find peace, a place where he could relax and forget the troubles that weighted heavily on his heart. But not anymore. Something was missing. Or rather someone.

Legolas sighed and rode forward. For a sixth year in a row he was going to Imladris for the Yule. And for a sixth year in a row he was going to be disappointed.

The elf closed his eyes and tried to push away the despair that threatened to claim him. No, he couldn't give up hope yet. Estel would keep his promise.

Unlike the last five times.

The young man was absently stroking the black horse's mane. He was looking at the ground and seemed reluctant to take the next step.

"You don't want to leave?" Legolas asked softly.

"I know I have to leave, and I have accepted it," Aragorn replied. "It is not that."

"What is it then?" The elf sounded worried.

"I know that I have to go to Rohan," his friend said. "I need to learn more about the world of Men. It is something that I must do, and I do not question it. It's just that," he paused and swallowed, not sure what to say next, "that I don't want to say 'goodbye'."

Legolas smiled warmly, "You know that the 'goodbye' is not forever. You will see me and your family again."

"I don't know when, mellon nin," he whispered almost inaudibly. "I don't know if it will be in a year, or ten, or even more." The ranger suddenly seemed hesitant.

"Oh, Estel," the elf took a step forward and grasped the man's forearm. "You know that it doesn't matter. No matter how much time you spend far away, this will always be your home and you can always come back."

"I am afraid of time, Legolas," the young man said softly. "I know that you do not feel it the way I do, but I am afraid that it will change me. I might spend five, or ten, or maybe fifteen years in Rohan, and for me this is a long time. I am afraid that when I come back, I will be someone else. I will no longer be 'Estel'."

Legolas was about to reply, but he was interrupted as the Lord of Imladris approached them, closely followed by his sons. "I see that you are ready to go, Estel," he scanned the young man carefully.

The ranger only nodded. 'Ready' was probably not the right word.

"I hope you will be able to come and visit some time, if your duties allow it. The road is long, but if you can spare a month or two to visit, it would make my heart happy."

"I don't know if this will be possible, Ada," Aragorn replied softly. "I am not sure what awaits me in Rohan."

"Whatever it is, my son, please promise me that you will try to come home for the Yule. You might not be able to come every year, but please return whenever you can."

"Alright," the man tried to smile. "I will try. I promise."

The twins made their farewells with their human brother, and the man mounted his horse and looked back for one last time. Legolas ran lightly to his friend and whispered softly, only for the human to hear, "Mellon nin, whatever happens, you will always be 'Estel'," the young ranger smiled in gratitude, and he continued, "we will wait for you." Aragorn nodded and rode forward.

The four elves watched as their friend, son, and brother disappeared into the forest.

"Ada, maybe we should have gone with him, at least half the way," the older twin suggested.

"Elladan!" The warning in his father's voice was evident.

"Well, maybe we can still follow him," he didn't give up that easily. "We can keep some distance and he will never notice."

"Elladan!" The elven lord almost shouted at his son, and walked back inside.

"I suppose that was a 'no'," Elrohir shrugged.

"Don't worry about him, Dan," Legolas tried to comfort his friend. "He is twenty-six, he can take care of himself."

The older twin gave a rather un-elflike snort, "He is Estel,"

Legolas chucked at that. "Still, don't worry about him. I am sure we will see him again soon. After all, he promised to come back if he can. We might even see him at next Yule."

They didn't. Neither did they see him on the one that followed, nor on any of the three after that.

At the first Yule after the parting, Legolas had traveled to Imladris, his heart overfilled with hope and joy. As might have been expected, Aragorn hadn't returned, and the prince celebrated with the peredhil family. Two months later Elrond received a letter from his son, saying that he wouldn't be able to spare the time to visit home. The next four years Legolas always spent the Yule in Imladris, but with every year the hope that his best friend would keep his promise grew dimmer.

Lost in his thoughts, Legolas didn't notice when he had reached the hidden elven haven. It was early morning and the red fingers of the dawn were lightly stroking the snow in the hidden valley. He had traveled during the night, but didn't feel tired.

The joyful song of a little winter bird took him out of his brooding. "You seem to be happy, mellon nin," he whispered to the creature. "Do you celebrate the Yule too?"

Instead of an answer, the bird sang merrily and flew towards its nest on a tall tree branch. Legolas smiled. The bird also wanted to go home for the festival. He let his gaze travel across the valley. He had come here numerous times, but he was always amazed at the peace that settled in his heart every time he set foot here. He took a deep breath of the fresh winter air and let the serenity of this place consume him. He had reached his second home.

"Legolas!" A dark-haired elf rode towards him, a smile on his face.

"Well met, mellon nin," the prince replied, still unable to discern from this distance if it was Elladan or Elrohir. When the other elf came nearer he could clearly see that it was the younger twin, and he smiled back.

"It's good to be home, Ro," he said softly.

"Home?" The peredhel grinned. "I'm glad you feel at home here, my friend."

Although Elrohir was smiling, the slight hint of sadness in his voice was not lost on his golden-haired companion. Legolas had the strange feeling that it was the twin who didn't feel at home here. This was surprising, Imladris would make every weary traveler feel in peace. Why would Elrohir be sad? There was only one possible reason.

"Ro…" Legolas started, but it seemed the elf had already guessed what he was going to ask. Elrohir turned his sad eyes towards the prince, and it was all the answer he needed. "Estel didn't come?" Legolas stated softly. It was not a question.

"We haven't heard from him in such a long time," the twin said, his voice slightly shaking.

"How long?" Legolas asked immediately, feeling a tight knot form in his stomach. Elrohir averted his gaze, which only added to his uneasy feeling. "How long?" He pressed once again.

"Two years," the elf's voice was barely audible.

"What!" Legolas halted his steed and stared at his friend in disbelief. "Last winter you told me that you haven't received any letters for a year. You mean you have no word of him since then?!"

The dark-haired elf nodded sadly. "No, mellon nin, but we mustn't be surprised. It is surely hard for him to find someone to bring the letters to Imladris. And he is constantly traveling…"

"I know!" Legolas interrupted him. "But still, it's two years, Ro! We don't even know if he… if he is alright," at the last moment he decided to replace 'alive' by 'alright', but it seemed that his friend had no trouble guessing his thoughts.

"He is alright, I am sure of it," he said, trying to sound more confident than he really was. "You know Estel, I don't think that anything that can happen to him could be worse than what he had already been through."

It can always be worse, Legolas thought darkly, but smiled despite that. After all Elrohir was right. Besides, there were five more days until Yule. Maybe the human would appear at the last possible minute.

But in his heart he felt that this would be a vain hope.

Dinner with the peredhil family was enjoyable as usual. Legolas was weary of the journey, and he hadn't had a decent meal in weeks, so he could fully appreciate the mastery of the Imladris cooks.

During the entire evening, Elrond's scrutinizing gaze never left his young guest. "Are you sure you are not hurt?" He asked once again. With Legolas one never knew.

The prince sighed, "My Lord, I already told you, my journey was uneventful."

"Forgive me for saying this, Legolas, but this is rather unusual for you," the Lord of Imladris smiled affectionately.

"I know, but fortunately Estel was not with me this time," he replied. "He is the one who brings us bad luck."

Legolas closed his eyes and sighed at the absurdity of what he had just said. Fortunately? No word could be more wrong. He wished his friend was with him, bad luck or not. If the human was by his side, he would gladly face all the evils in Middle-earth.

Elrond noticed his guest's sudden change in demeanor. "I believe you are tired, young one. Maybe it is time for you to go to your room."

Legolas smiled slightly. His room. He had his own room in Imladris due to his frequent visits. In the recent years he had spent almost as much time here, as in Mirkwood. He even had his own clothes here, so that he could travel light. This place surely was his second home.

Legolas sat on the soft bed and slowly dressed into his sleeping tunic. Then he walked to the large window and breathed the fresh night air. It was good to be here.

The elf lay down on his bed and stared at the ceiling. He was tired, his limbs hurt from the long ride, but still sleep somehow eluded him. Surrounded by perfect serenity, he felt restless. He tossed in his bed for about an hour, but couldn't fall asleep. Finally he gave up and walked to the kitchen to drink a glass of water.

On his way back he briefly stopped in front of the door next to his room. He eyed the wooden frame, and carefully pressed the doorknob. It opened and the elf slowly peeked into the room.

The chamber was clean and tidy; everything was at the right place. Untouched. As it had been six years ago. The peredhil family was unwilling to change anything, or give the room to someone else. They never lost hope that their son and brother would come back and need it once again.

Legolas silently walked into the room. He could easily see everything in the pale moonlight. His hand absently stroked the back of an armchair on his way. He turned, his eyes examining every object, every corner. He sat on the bed and sighed softly. Everything was so familiar, so painfully familiar. He lay down and stared at the dark ceiling, his thoughts running wild.

Before he knew it, Legolas was fast asleep.

Snowflakes were falling in circles, covering the valley with a white carpet. Legolas was standing on the bridge, enjoying the peacefulness of the place and the beautiful songs of the winter birds. The sun was setting, and the view of the valley was breathtaking. Red rays shone through the snow-covered branches, and the crimson sun reflected on the ice of the frozen river.

Legolas was standing on the bridge, gazing at the icy surface of the river. Troubles weighted heavily on his mind. Once again he had come to look for hope and peace in Imladris, but this time the place didn't make him feel better. The darkness in Mirkwood was growing every day. He was supposed to be there and face it with the other elves. He felt as if he was running away. As if he was hiding.

The elf almost jumped as a snowball hit him in the face.

He turned around to face his attacker, fury burning in his blue eyes. The thirteen-year-old human just grinned innocently. "Estel, leave me alone!" He snapped, not even trying to hide his irritation. "I am thinking."

"About what?" The boy asked cheerfully, not having the least intention to leave his friend alone.

"Nothing important," the elf replied softly.

"It doesn't look like 'nothing important' to me," Estel observed, noting the elf's melancholic features. Legolas sighed and turned around. "Do you know what I think?" The boy continued, his voice sounding suddenly mischievous. "I think that the entire 'I am thinking' is just an excuse. You are simply afraid of losing a snowball fight to a mere human!"

"Oh, you think so?" Legolas suddenly turned to him. "Well, we will see who is afraid, my friend," before he had finished, a snowball hit the boy's chest..

Soon human and elven laughter filled the valley. Estel smiled. His plan had succeeded. He had managed to take his friend out of his brooding.

Legolas was also smiling, all worry gone from his heart. It had worked once again. Every time he came to Imladris, he felt in peace.

Before he could realize what was happening, the boy jumped at him and knocked him down. They both rolled together, and soon Estel found himself lying on the ground, Legolas' arms pinning him securely, so that he couldn't move. "Who won now, human?" He asked teasingly, all irritation gone from his voice, replaced by pure mirth.

"I did," Estel said confidently. Legolas smiled and lay tiredly in the snow. Estel was right. He had won.

He had won the battle against grief and despair once again.

"Legolas?" Elladan looked down in surprise. "Why are you lying in the snow?"

"Oh," the prince looked slightly embarrassed. "I just, well, never mind," he murmured as he realized that there was nothing he could say that would help his situation."

"Are you alright?" The older twin asked worriedly.

Legolas looked down. He wasn't. His dark thoughts were trying to consume him once again, and he needed something to push them away. Desperately. "I am alright, Dan," he hesitated as he stood up. "Can I ask you something?"

"Anything," Elladan looked at him, slightly worried by his friend's behavior.

"Can we…," he seemed unsure of himself, "umm, can we have a snowball fight?"

Elladan's eyebrows rose in surprise, but the grin that spread across his face was genuine. "Of course, mellon nin, I would greatly enjoy that," he laughed. "But maybe after dinner. Ada is waiting. He was concerned when you didn't come back on time."

Legolas nodded sadly and walked after the twin. Later wasn't good enough. He needed it now.

On the second day of Legolas' visit the three young elves had gone on a hunting trip. This day wasn't as cold as the rest, and the winter sun was shining merrily, making the snow glitter in all the colors of the rainbow.

There wasn't much game in this time of year, so the three friends were just riding through the forest, enjoying each other's company. Soon they reached a small clearing.

"We could make a competition," Elrohir suddenly suggested. "We could separate and hunt on our own, and come back here in two hours and see who had been most successful."

"There are hardly any animals to hunt, Ro," his brother pointed out. "But it sounds interesting. We could try that."

Legolas nodded in agreement and smirked at the twins, "May the best hunter win," he called out and rode to his left, quickly disappearing into the trees.

The white fur of the rabbit blended completely with the snow. The perfect protection. Hidden from the greedy eyes of beasts of prey.

But the keen elven eyes spotted it easily. Legolas nocked an arrow and let it fly. Food was needed for the Yule celebration and he had to do his best.

He smiled slightly as he took the killed animal. He doubted that the twins would find anything, so he could very well win with this single rabbit.

Legolas left his horse and walked along a path, content with simply walking under the trees. He didn't realize when his feet carried him to river. His eyes swiftly traveled to a massive rock outcropping above the water.

Legolas shook his head. It still looked to him like a horse.

"This is incredible!" The elf gasped and looked across the river. "It is so pretty!"

His companion gave him a strange look, "What is pretty, mellon nin?"

"The rock! Look, it looks almost like a horse – the ears, the legs…"

Estel shook his head. Those elves… they could see beauty everywhere. "Hmm, well, to me it looks like… a rock," he replied simply.

"Estel!" Unbelieving blue eyes turned at him. "Even you, human, have to admit that the view is beautiful!"

The sixteen-year-old boy sighed. It was pretty, and he always appreciated beauty, but his friend looked a bit 'overfascinated'. "Well, it certainly doesn't look like a horse to me. But if you want, we may take a closer look. Come!" He grabbed the elf by the sleeve and pulled him towards the shore.

"Estel, what are you doing?" Legolas asked in dismay. "We cannot cross the river!"

"Why not?" The human only smiled and dragged his friend to the water.

To the elf's greatest surprise they didn't slip and safely made it to the other shore. "And now what?" He looked at his friend questioningly.

"Now we are going to climb on the rock and take a better look," the young man stated happily and started climbing.

Legolas stared at the smooth rock surface. It was clearly impossible to climb even for him, let alone for a human. He shook his head in desperation, and smiled at his young friend's enthusiasm.

"Aren't you coming!" The human called from above.

"No, I am staying here to catch you when you fall," Legolas replied, barely hiding the amusement in his voice.

The boy chuckled and suddenly released his grip on the rock, and immediately flew downwards.

"Estel!" The elf shouted in shock and spread his arms to catch his falling friend. He did, and they both fell hard on the ground. "What do you think you are doing, insane human?!"

"Well, you said that you would stay here to catch me if I fell. And I just wanted to check if you were alert enough," the boy grinned.

"What?!" His friend stared in disbelief and quickly stood up. "Now we are going back and no more climbing!"

"But we must climb on the rock to see if it looks like a horse," Estel protested.

"Alright," the elf sighed. "Please, don't climb, and I will admit that it looks like, hmm, 'a rock', as you put it so poetically."

"So I win then?" The boy asked.

Legolas smiled at this, one of those brilliant smiles of his, always accompanied by a happy glimmer in the blue eyes.

Estel smiled back. He had won indeed, but he had won much more than a pointless argument. He had won another smile for his friend, one of those smiles that warmed his heart. Every time Legolas arrived in Imladris, his eyes were clouded with worry, and every time he left, they were glistening with mirth. The young man would do anything to make his friend happy. He had to admit the rock looked surprisingly like a horse, but he would always start a friendly teasing, and would even jump off rocks, just to see another smile upon that face.

"You won, Estel," the elf said softly, a glitter of understanding in his eyes. "You always do."

"Legolas!" The twins had finally found him. They had returned to the clearing and had followed his tracks. "Did you come across any game?" Elladan asked, but was taken aback as blue eyes turned towards him. He was surprised at the tears he could see.

"Yes," the prince pointed towards the rabbit and rose to his feet.

"What is it, mellon nin?" Elladan wouldn't let the matter go easily.

Legolas looked sadly at his friends. "I think I am going back."

"Back to Mirkwood?" The twins were startled. "You won't stay for the Yule? Why?"

Legolas sighed. How could he explain to the twins that he had hoped to find peace here, but he hadn't? That he hoped to find rest, but his soul found none. "I was looking for home," he said softly. "I couldn't find it."

His friends nodded grimly. They understood. They understood all too well.

"How unfortunate," Thranduil spoke sadly. "It is a pity you came to visit while my son is absent. I believe he traveled to Imladris because he hoped to see you there."

"I also wanted to go home, but I couldn't," Aragorn sighed sadly. After he had moved from Rohan to Gondor, his duties had increased. This winter he had been sent on a mission to Rohan once again, and he had hoped that he would be able to visit his family at last. Unfortunately, time was never enough. Finally he found some time, but he sadly realized that it wouldn't be able to make it. Crossing the Misty Mountains in winter took a long time.

Then another idea came to him. He could visit Legolas instead. True, the road was long, but at least he didn't need to go across the mountains which would have slowed him down. He wouldn't be able to go for the Yule, he would arrive in Mirkwood about a month later, but it didn't matter.

When he estimated how long he would need to reach the Elven realm and travel back, he was horrified to discover that he could spend no more than a day or two in Mirkwood. But it would be worth it. He knew it would ease his troubled soul.

"When did he leave?" he asked. He couldn't despair yet. During the past month he had waited for the reunion with his best friend, and now he couldn't just let his hopes fly away. True, it felt good to be among elves once again, but that wasn't enough.

"About two months ago," the King replied. "He planned to stay in Imladris for the Yule. Even if he had left immediately after that, he won't be back for at least a few more days. Are you sure you cannot wait that long? May son would be happy to see you."

Aragorn was sure. He could leave on the next day the latest, and if there was no hope that Legolas would come back by then, there was no point in delaying. "I will leave today," he said softly.

"Are you sure you won't stay at least for the night," Thranduil asked. "It will not delay you that much."

The man sighed. How could he explain to the King that there was no point in staying? That he had hoped to find peace here, but there was none?

"I was looking for home," he finally said. "I couldn't find it."

Thranduil nodded. He understood.

Horse hoofs were tiredly sinking into the snow. The white mare stopped to rest, and her rider didn't urge her forward. He was too lost in his own thoughts.

The Prince of Mirkwood was returning home.

Home.

He snorted at the absurdity of the notion. He had long ago forgotten what that word meant.

Legolas slightly regretted leaving Imladris. He hadn't found the peace he had been looking for, but still it was better than here. With every step his steed took, the darkness encroached around him more and more.

Soon he would arrive at the palace, and take his duties as a Prince once again. He sighed. It wasn't something he was looking forward to, but it was necessary.

Legolas was sure his father would be pleasantly surprised to see him return a few days earlier. He had left a few days before the Yule, and was arriving home earlier than expected.

He had approached the palace gates, when he suddenly heard them close. Maybe someone had just entered? Or was just leaving?

Curious to find out, the elf rode forward. He could hear the soft sound of the hoofs of a single horse. The other rider had just stopped. Obviously, he had heard him approach.

Out of habit, Legolas raised his bow and nocked an arrow. It made no sense of course, if the rider was coming out of the palace, he had to be a friend, but in Mirkwood one could never be sure.

Still not letting go of his weapon, he rode forward. He could hear that the stranger wasn't moving, probably waiting for him to appear.

Suddenly the other rider came into view. His bow was also raised, and an arrow was ready to fly with deadly accuracy.

And Legolas knew that the arrow would find its mark. He had personally taught this rider how to shoot.

Both man and elf dropped their weapons and stared in shock. "Legolas?" The ranger was the first to gain control over his senses. He wasn't that surprised to see the elf although he hadn't expected him to come back that soon. "I have almost lost the hope to see you, mellon nin!" He smiled. It was about time to learn never to lose hope.

Legolas still stared, eyeing the human suspiciously. The thirty-two-year-old man was so familiar, and at the same time so different. On his face he could see scars and lines of worry he had never seen before, and in his eyes, yes, in those gray eyes always so naively full of hope, he could see other scars. The scars of war.

Their last conversation came back to him with full force. I am afraid that when I come back, I will be someone else. I will no longer be 'Estel'. And the elf realized the terrible truth. During the past six years his friend had seen more cruelty and war than Legolas had during his centuries-long life. Was he the same man he knew? Yes, no doubt this was Aragorn, but was he still Estel?

"Estel?" He asked hesitantly.

The man flinched at the doubt he had heard in the fair voice. "Have I changed that much?" He asked, his own voice trembling slightly. "Well, at least I can see that you haven't changed at all," he suddenly said in a much lighter tone. He rode closer to his friend and carefully examined him from head to toe. "You seem to be the same prissy elf!" He added, sounding amused.

Legolas blinked in surprise. Before he could say anything, however, his friend continued. "Are we going to stay here all day? Let's race to the palace! Of course, only if you aren't afraid of losing to a mere human."

Legolas' had never smiled more widely before. It was still Estel. And always would be.

Aragorn finally arrived at the palace gates. His horse panted heavily. He had exerted the poor animal to the limit of his strength, but still was unable to arrive before the prince.

A golden-haired elf was leaning casually on the wall, a smug smile on his face. "Who won this time, human?" He asked, his voice filled with uncontained mirth.

"I think you know the answer to that, mellon nin," Estel replied.

Legolas nodded smiling. "You did. Once again."

"You look happy, my friend," Aragorn suddenly observed. Of course the elf had to be happy to see him again, but he sensed that there was something more. In those blue eyes he could see peace and content he had never seen before.

"I am," Legolas answered simply. "I am home."

Estel smiled. He fully understood what his friend meant. "So am I."

THE END